General Grievous!

Dis sloppy paperfolden isa General Grievous. Dis bombad model was berry difficult maken. Itsa usen da eighta-flappen bird basen, except my no blintzen.

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Disa model haven de legs, de arms, de everything, but asa all’n yous can see, itsa no easy to make it. My folden all sloppy. Daresa nutsen noomba of folden, so itsa thicken. My no posten instruxens.

Also, mesa speaken Goonga for no reason. Seelongabye! All’n yous in da Youessay be haven a happy Tanksgiven, okeyday?

Countering creationsciencestudy part FOUR with #BoycottStarWarsEpisodeVII

It’s official: in terms of bashing Star Wars, Jim and Martin have topped themselves. You know what that meas!

This post is so stupid that I am starting to think these guys aren’t for real.

Greetings True Christians. Perverted magic underwear director and Agent of Satan, George Lucas and godless Hollywood are at it once again by releasing the upcoming Star Wars film which is based on Mormon, atheistic, and Buddhist ideas. Little does the public know that the new film spews Marxist ideas that glorify Russia’s rise during the Cold War. It’s also no surprise that the film’s release on Christmas is a political move by America’s Cultural Marxism movement to demonize Christmas and to continue the War on Christmas. The Devil’s favorite sinners, Star Wars fans and Trekkies, will definitely plan on rejoicing this filth by worshiping the “force”, but we Christians know the True Force and that is The One and only True Creator, God.

Good grief. Let’s break it down here. (This should seem familiar.)

George is not Mormon. I have no idea HOW many times I have to tell you that. Also, combing Mormonism with atheism makes no sense. And you have no basis for calling the new film Marxist when it hasn’t been released yet. For all we know it could be an allegory AGAINST the Cold War– something you would still condemn for reasons we will discuss later in the post.

War on Christmas. You really brought the War on Christmas into the discussion? Just because this movie comes out in December does not qualify it to be considered part of the War on Christmas.

As for the last part of that paragraph, let’s all post in the comments: I am a Star Wars fan, I am Christian, and I worship GOD, not the Force!

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The film starts on a barren desert planet with a female character and smutty female aliens. Undoubtedly, this planet can be seen as a reference to Lucas’ Mormon belief of the planet Kolob where God lives there and is just a human being who has sexual relations with many woman.

Again, we have NO IDEA where this starts. Don’t judge a movie by its trailer. The desert planet being a reference to the Celestial Kingdom and abode of God in LDS faith is an entirely laughable concept– oh, wait, that goes for the whole post. We don’t believe God is “just a human being who has sexual relations with many women.” We believe that He is a GOD, not a MAN, who has ONE Wife, who we refrain from mentioning out of respect so that others do not take Her name in vain as they do the Lord’s.

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The Force Awakens also has Darwinist ideas in it. The Stormtroopers are originally depicted as white, superior beings in the Star Wars films, but Lucas goes further by having a black person play as a stormtrooper. By pulling this little stunt, Lucas is simply spreading his Darwinist beliefs by making it appear as if black people “evolved” from white people. This is ungodly stuff that Lucas likes to smuggle in his films. Don’t forget that Lucas is also hiding racist themes in the movie. With the black guy dressed as a stormtrooper, Lucas expresses his racist Mormon beliefs that one must be truly cleansed of sin by going from black to white, and this is also probably a reference to former Mormon Michael Jackson who tired to be fully white by bleaching his skin and is now in Hell! Also look at how Lucas likes to depict stormtroopers to look like members of the KKK. Why are they not correctly called Klantroopers in the movies?

They were depicted as white and superior because they were supposed to represent Nazis. Let me explain why this is a good thing:

Villains are supposed to represent evil– i.e, teach us what NOT to do. So when the stormtroopers are compared to Nazis, it means the Nazis were EVIL, because the stormtroopers are EVIL. If evil villains in literature were a bad thing… Well, let’s just assume that it is. Here is a mini-post on the wickedness in the Bible.

Greetings True Christians! Did you know that the Bible is evil? That’s right boys and girls! It is full of adultery, murder, stealing, and other acts contrary to the Ten Commandments! Potiphar’s wife encourages people to be an evil slut! Cain teaches people to murder! Judas is blasphemy against Christ! False Christians will tell you that the Bible is the only way to Christ, but they are WRONG! Let us boycott the “Holy” Bible and bring our souls back to Christ!

(For duos with a combined IQ of 2, that was sarcasm.) Obviously this argument is horribly flawed. In the argument, the villains of the Bible teach people to be wicked, instead of good. Obviously, the lessons we are supposed to learn from the Bible is to not replicate the actions of the wicked people in it. Hopefully that ironic mini-post helps illustrate the principle.

DISNEY has a black person play a trooper because in the Star Wars universe, the Empire is not racist, it is speciesist (Think human privilege instead of white privilege.) So, after the clones became obsolete, ordinary human draftees were trained as soldiers, and the Empire doesn’t care if you’re black or white, as long as you’re human. Also, do you know what Darwinists (atheist Darwinists anyway) believe about black people? That white people evolved from THEM! This is not true, of course, but neither they nor we (Mormons) nor George believe that blacks evolved from whites. Also, we don’t believe you have to be white to be clean. Sometimes, God will curse a wicked posterity with blackness, but if they are righteous, he does not always remove the darkness of their skin. God loves diversity, after all. We shouldn’t think that because of Ham’s curse or Laman’s curse that all Indians or black people are cursed today. And we DON’T.

Michael Jackson bleached his skin for his own reasons, none of which had to do with LDS beliefs.

“Why are they not called Klantroopers?” SMH. Because in Star Wars, the KKK doesn’t exist! (gasp) Yes, the stormtroopers may represent the KKK, but this is a good thing for the above reasons (i.e, that they teach people not to join the KKK.) The reason they aren’t called Klantroopers is because there is no KKK in Star Wars, there is the Empire.

The villain is unmasked and next to stormtroopers resembling the KKK!

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But there is more that we must warn about this film. Images released of the Force Awakens show how there is an undeniable connection with the Nuremberg Rallies of Nazi Germany.

Again, probably a good thing. Unless the HEROES are portrayed as Nazis, and not the villains, then this movie is anti-Nazi.

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Nuremberg Rally

The film also tells us Lucas was inspired by the Cold War and the rise of Communism in Russia and China. Just look at that red flag in the background with a symbol used by the New World Order in the movie. Red was the color during the Cold War that symbolized fear and oppression to Christians. By connecting scenes to the Nuremberg Rallies and Communist Russia, Lucas makes it clear that Star Wars is about furthering the communist agenda favored by Hitler, Marx, Mandela, and Carter. Lucas and smutty Hollywood want Cultural Marxism to spread in America and for Modern Day Christiandom to be erased.

It’s called the First Order, not the Illuminati First World Order. Again, VILLAINS TEACH US NOT TO BE VILLAINOUS! SERIOUSLY! I mean, heaven forbid that villains be EVIL, right? Here is Star Wars without the bad guys:

ALTAIAGFFA, there were many planets and aliens, who all lived in harmony and did good and there were no wars. The end. See, now this movie can’t even be called Star Wars! And without villains, you can’t see how evil people like those villains were and think, “I don’t want to be like that! The KKK is evil!”

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What exactly is the force? Trekkies may respond by saying it is a luminous and mystical power, but in reality “The Force” is an unbiblical theme that relates to Buddhism and other Asian religions, like Hinduism, that worship False Gods. Essentially, the “Jedi”, who are actually a cult of monks in disguise, worship this power in order to become ungodly sorcerers. Never in the Star Wars films do the Jedi pray to God for help; they only worship this energy as their own God, which violates the Ten Commandments telling that you should not worship any other gods. Sadly, the fans of these movies also worship their personal idol by the name of Yoda who is a champion of “the force” and clearly Buddha in disguise. Obviously Jesus does not matter to the fans. We Christians know Jesus as the True Force and the way to Heaven. Star Wars gets you nowhere but to Hell!

Again, confusing of trekkies with Star Wars fans. The Force is not a religion, it is not a God. It is also not real. Only deluded Star Wars fans actually practice what is known as Jediism, and I pray for those misguided souls to find Christ so that nuts like you guys can shut up. (BTW, most atheists think all Christians are like you guys. This is why we don’t get taken seriously.) The Jedi in Star Wars don’t pray because they don’t know the true God, yes, but in Star Wars, He probably doesn’t exist. (Because Star Wars is a STORY, so God doesn’t have to be in it.) That isn’t to say that they don’t pray; some Jedi worship gods, which aren’t the true God but aren’t the Force either. Because the FORCE IS NOT A RELGION/GOD.

Fans of the movies who ACTUALLY worship Yoda are misguided and I pray for them. I’m starting to repeat myself here. Sadly, it appears Yoda will not be in these movies, so those people will be disappointed. Most likely, they’ll put something about him in the trilogy to appease fans of the original movies, but he most likely won’t play a large role as he did in the other six. Sure, he could represent Buddha. Buddha was wise. But I don’t agree with everything he said, and I don’t practice his religion, so yeah. “We Christians know that Jesus is the true way to get to heaven!” Couldn’t agree more. “Star Wars will get you nowhere but Hell!” Couldn’t agree less.

There are other ungodly themes in Episode 7. Pirates in the movie undoubtedly resemble uncivilized and savage Somalia pirates who want to take our freedoms away from America. And there are also the gay robot pair, R2-B2 and CD3PDO who inspired the homosexual movie Brokeback Mountain. Aliens are unbiblical since they imply God created life elsewhere and not on Earth as stated in The Book of Genesis.

Let’s assume the pirates are heroes instead of villains. This might actually happen. So you could have a point that they teach people to steal. It wouldn’t be a very strong point but I’d give it to you out of pity. But certainly they don’t represent Somali pirates who want to steal our freedom. Most likely these pirates will aid the rebels in the cause of freedom from the Empire. Making them freedom fighters, not freedom destroyers.

Gay robots. Too ridiculous to address properly. I believe the phrase appropriate here is “I can’t even”. Also, LEARN TO SPELL THEIR NAMES RIGHT! I SWEAR YOU ARE DOING IT ON PURPOSE!

“Aliens are unbiblical because they imply God created life elsewhere and not on Earth.” Well, we KNOW God created life on Earth, because if we assume He is real and created life, then there is no way to say that there is no life on Earth because clearly, there is. That is not to say He didn’t create life on other planets. Nowhere does it say in the Bible, “And God created life on one planet only.” Also, come on, it’s sci-fi. Of course there are aliens. You don’t like sci-fi, do you. But you like C S Lewis. I do too. He was a good, strong Christian writer who wrote about Christian themes. But he wrote some sci-fi, so… (Also, he wrote his own adaption of the Greek myth of Eros and Psyche, which has other gods in it and not God, so how do you feel about that? Actually, he uses the pagan gods and mythical characters to teach Christian themes, so really there’s no problem, but when has that stopped you from finding fault with anything?)

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Heathen pirates. They don’t worship God, so technically, they are heathens, so yes, you are right.

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No they don’t. That’s from the OLD movie, where they commit ZERO homosexual acts. And FYI they are called R2-D2 and C-3PO.

It is unfortunate that The Force Awakens is being released this Christmas as an attempt to continue the War on Christmas but also to demonize Christmas. Lucas wants to spread his atheistic, Hindu, and mormon beliefs to the world as an attempt to brainwash Christians and to make more fans follow his cult. The films are an insult to Christianity since Annakan Skywalker, who was destined to become the good guy like Jesus after being born of a virgin birth, turned to pure evil and the opposite of Jesus. Star Wars, or more appropriately Satan Wars, is responsible for causing a rise in New Age practices like witchcraft, paganism, worshiping the Illuminati, and atheism. The films are also responsible for the bullying of Christians, gay marriages, believing in evolution, teenage sexuality, Rock n Roll, and other vile acts that offend God. As we Christians know, anybody who ever claimed to be all powerful with the “force” in biblical times would be stoned to death, but we know the Christian way is to preach the word of God and hope that they become saved. Does God ever matter to Star Wars fans? God is the one and True Force out there who created the Heavens and Earth. As Christians, it is our goodly duty to fight the evils from Hollywood and to take back the movies and TVs for Christ. We must boycott this film, Lucas, and other films that attack Christians.

Blahdy blahdy blah… repeating yourselves and stuff… Just because Anakin was born of a virgin like Jesus doesn’t mean his whole life was patterned after Jesus. Writers can do what they want. They don’t have to carry an allegory all the way through. All that Anakin’s birth signified was that he was going to be the savior of the galaxy– and not in the spiritual sense, the sense that he would destroy the Sith (imbalance in the Force) and make the galaxy peaceful again. But his evil legacy as Vader lives on though he turned good, because in the new movies Kylo Ren is apparently trying to follow in his footsteps and restore what he destroyed. It’s like Darwin. He said some stuff that people took the wrong way, repudiated those ideas on his deathbed, and yet atheists still cling to them. Even though Anakin turned good, Kylo Ren is embracing the evil that Vader himself rejected.

Jim Solouki and Martin Baker

Who probably will ignore this post and stick their fingers in their ears going lalalalalalalalalala. Not sure if extreme conservatives or extreme liberals…